BULLYING- A SUBTLY HARMFUL PHENOMENON

BY Anushka Vilankar 

Pursuing Masters in Psychology 

I read a quote somewhere that said ‘Not all forms of abuse leaves bruises’, and the first thought that crossed my mind was how accurate this quote was. Majority of the world leans onto the bruises that are visible and tend to ignore those that are hidden behind smiling faces. The act of bullying is what forces the people to conceal their bruises behind the mask of their routines. Bullying is a repeated aggressive behaviour where one person or group of people in a position of power deliberately intimidates, abuses, or coerces an individual with the intention to hurt that person physically or emotionally. Bullying is not only limited to physical means but it stretches out to verbal means too. Let’s dive into the different types of bullying that usually takes place:

1. Physical bullying- the most common form of bullying that includes hitting, kicking, tripping, pinching or even punching. The bruises arising from this kind of bullying gets all the attention as it can have short and long term affects. 
2. Verbal bullying- it leaves a permanent scratch on the person’s self confidence as it includes name calling, insults, teasing, intimidation, homophobic or racial slurs. The person who becomes a victim of this starts to identify himself by the insult that he is being referred by. It puts a great toll on the person’s mental health for a long run. 
3. Social bullying- it leads to an individual walking around with a sense of embarrassment or guilt or even shame, without him committing an act causing same. This walk of shame happens due to the rumours spread about him, mimicking unkindly, playing nasty jokes to embarrass him or even encouraging others to socially exclude him. This along with verbal bullying drops the person’s self esteem to zero. 
4. Cyber bullying- technology is a boon and bane. Well, as many boons as it has, it contains equal amounts of banes too. People have started using the internet to claim their power over others by sending abusive texts, spreading nasty rumours about them all over the net, photoshopping their pictures into a hurtful one and harassing them. This forces the people to leave their bubble on the internet only to return to become the victim of physical, verbal and social bullying.

Whenever I hear a particular story of bullying, I think to myself what pleasure do others get by bullying innocent people? There is no one reason as to why people bully others. Children and adults can be bullies for a number of reasons. Many have been bullied themselves so they are convinced that it is an appropriate way of behaviour. Sometimes it can be an expression of anger or frustration due to problems they have, such as problems at home or struggling at school or work. It can also be the result of poor upbringing - some people have not been taught to be sensitive to or care about other people's feelings. Violent games or movies may influence some people's behaviour and make them more likely to be bullies. For some it may be an attention-seeking behaviour - for example, if they are not getting enough care and attention at home or elsewhere, they resort to such actions for making themselves feel validated. Whatever the causes of bullying may be, it has harmful effects on the individual being bullied. By harmful, it not only includes physical harm but to a greater extent mental harm too. 

1. First and foremost, the child may portray physical symptoms such as headaches, bodyaches as a result of stress caused by bullying. 
2. The individual might start having nightmares or may have difficulty sleeping. The fear of dreaming about their bullying incidences may not let them have a good night’s sleep. 
3. Children particularly may start avoiding school or their other recreational activities because they do not want to encounter the bullies again. Due to this behaviour, their performance in school starts getting hampered and they lose total interest in academics. 
4. The individual has a constant face of worry or sadness even in situations that do not demand them to be the same. They lose self-confidence making them unable to enjoy situations of joy or celebration. 
5. Stammering takes place when the individual being bullied experiences excessive nervousness and starts to show signs of anxiety throughout the day, which includes, stammering, sweating, biting their nails, shaking their legs, not sitting stable and shivering. 
6. The loss of self-confidence and self-esteem may push the person to cross the boundary of suicidal thoughts to actually engaging in suicidal behaviours. The individual may look for options to end his life because he finds himself unable to cope with the repercussions of getting bullied. 

Bullying is an invisible poison that somehow manages to enter your system and pollute it for life. So, stand up for yourself if you are being bullied, if not, then stand up for those who are being bullied. Remember, if you turn your face the other way when someone is being bullied, you might as well be the bully too.  

Posted 3 years ago